The Ministry of a Husband

Introduction – Don’t kid yourselves, men. It is true that we have addressed the subject of being a husband, and it is true that you have thought about it and probably changed quite a bit as the Word has had its way with you. But God is not finished with us yet. And it is always good to repeat and review these principles. For we must put them into practice today and tomorrow and the next day…..

God’s Idea (Eph 5:31, Gen 2:24) – We do not get to define what marriage is or what a husband is. The Word of God declares that marriage was the will and design of God.

Marriage – This is a sexual union of one man and one woman protected by covenant vows of faithfulness to one another before God and society. Without the backbone of biblical families, we cannot have a Christian civilization.

Husband – He is to take dominion over the land and all to the glory of God. But he is to do so by means of his helper and the establishment of his own family. This is the ministry of a husband. How is he to know if he is doing this well? Our standard is not relative to how others are doing. Our standard is not determined by what we or our culture decides. Our standard is our conformity to what the scriptures teach.

“Husbands, love your wives…” (Eph 5:25-27) – This love is defined “as Christ loved the church”. We must consider how Christ did that, and how we imitate Him.

Not Just A Lot – Too often, the picture of Christ loving His church is measured by how much He suffered without considering why He suffered. This second Adam is doing what the first Adam would not do. We must love our wives as covenantal heads (v23), for Christ is our covenantal Head. That means husbands are responsible for all that goes on in the home. She may be guilty. He is always responsible.

Efficacious Love – Christ loved His bride, taking responsibility for her loveliness. He sanctified her, and he loves her in such a way as to present to Himself in all her glory. A man who loves his wife transforms her.

Incarnational Love – His love was not primarily sentimental and full of good intentions. It was a love that affected His life greatly. He provided for the real needs of His bride.

“Husbands ought to love their wives…” (Eph 5:28-32) – This love is defined selfishly. We are not only required to love our wives, but to delight in doing so. And this requires that we understand our position as federal heads.

Christ and His body – Anything Christ did for His body, the church, brings glory and pleasure to Himself. If we see the same pattern for our marriage, a husband will lay his life down for his wife, for he will know that he is simply loving himself – and all husbands are good at that.

Nourish and Cherish – These words describe our duties. We are to provide for our wives physical and spiritual needs, and we are to provide tenderness, warmth, honor and protection.

Preaching Christ All Day Long – Husbands find themselves in a remarkable and inescapable position. As husbands, they cannot stop leading ever, for he is the head of his wife. And he cannot stop preaching Christ, for he is a picture of Christ’s love to the church, His body. He is preaching truth or lies, but he never ceases to preach.

Loyalty (Prov 5:15-19) – A husband is focused upon one woman alone. Lust and adultery are forbidden, as is the sin of comparison. For he must discipline himself to delight in the particular bride he has been given. His love for her must rise above all other human relations.

Provider (Ex 21:10) – In this regulation we can see what the minimum requirements of provision are. The wife should have full cupboards, full closets, and fulfilling conjugal satisfaction. Otherwise, he is worse than an unbeliever (1 Tim 5:8).

Tender Masculinity (Josh 24:14-15) – He leads because he has a vision, not because he is a tyrant. He knows he is incomplete without her. He brings her along well because he is a student of his wife. He knows how she particularly best receives encouragement, instruction, admonition and praise, and he adds to his knowledge action. He can pastor his wife (1 Cor 14:35, 2 Tim 2:15).

She is His Crown (Prov 12:4a) – In and out of the home, this should be manifest. He shows her like a crown. There is well-developed etiquette that reflects this truth around others. And in the home, the husband never undercuts his wife, never demeans her, never treats her like one of the children. He stands with her as a united front before the children, and they learn from his example that this woman in particular deserves special honor and respect.

What’s the Goal? – Why has God set the world up this way? What is He intending to accomplish.

Cultural Mandate – The world is to be ‘created’ by mankind into a beautiful garden where everything sits under the dominion of the ones who are made in God’s image. And the married couple, man and wife, together and blessed by God, do this well.

Godly Offspring – It is God’s intention to pass on His promised blessings in an unbroken succession from generation to generation until the final day. He desires godly offspring.

Evangelism to the World – He sets men in a place where they speak of God the Father to their children and of Christ the Savior to their wives all day, every day. Husbands are a gospel tract. And who is sufficient for such things? Dave Hatcher – July 8, 2001