Family
Issues #5 – A Home of Loyalty (Deuteronomy 6)
Introduction – As parents, we are
not simply trying to get our children to conform to a set of standards we
believe to be biblical (which is, in fact, not biblical). The task is to lead our children in the fear
of the Lord, and the love of God from whole
hearts. Loyalty to the Lord and
loyalty to the family in the Lord is the center of the task of godly
child-rearing.
An Overview of the Chapter – This sermon,
coming after the giving of the Ten Commandments, highlights the need for
personal and familial loyalty to the Lord.
God Has
Commanded and Promised (vv 1-3) – The covenant community of
believers shall live according to the Word of the Lord and He in turn will
provide great blessings (Ps
The Shema (v4) – Christ told us
this was the greatest commandment and that the second was like it. Fear and love are both a part of
obedience. Our love for God is a weighty
love; it is tangible, objective, full of affection, and obvious to all around.
Reminding,
Teaching, Applying (vv5-9) – That
weighty loyalty, which pervades all of our lives, is to be passed on to our
children. We must teach them in all
situations and at all times.
Do Not Forget
His Kindness (vv 10-19) – The temptation when we are blessed
is that we will forget the Lord. The
temptation in trials will be to tempt the Lord with our stiff-necked
complaining and lack of trust in Him.
The temptation will also be to neglect teaching our children in fat
times and lean times to trust, fear, love, and serve God.
Do Not Let Your
Children Forget (vv20-25) – Even though this next
generation was not there when
The Context of Loyalty:
Love – Seeing the chapter
as a whole, we see that the Lord’s requirement for obedience is given in the
context of His love upon us. He loved us
in our unloveliness (Rom 5:8). Husbands love their wives and make them lovely. Parents love their children and, in that
context, require and are promised loyalty.
The aroma of our covenant with God is grace, favor, and lovingkindess. This
must be the aroma of our home.
Central to the
Home: Love God
– We are to bring our children up “in the training and admonition of the Lord” (Eph 6). Fundamentally, this means we are to teach our
children to believe God. In the context
of God’s promises to our children, we should not teach them to doubt when they
say they love God. We should do all we
can to encourage that with all the weightiness of the Shema.
Discipline in
the Context of Love and Loyalty – Now, when the rules
are broken, the child sees in the discipline a break in fellowship, not a loss
of status. He sees that he has broken
God’s laws; he is not being disciplined because he
irritated or embarrassed his Dad. He
sees Dad and Mom remain spiritually qualified to administer God’s instruction
(Gal 6:1). He hears and sees forgiveness
given, fellowship restored, and joy returned.
In the end, discipline becomes a great cleansing agent, and a time of
fruit (Heb
Loyalty Taught
in all the Corners – We should look at Deut 6:5-9
again. Informal education and quantity
time are the only way to accomplish this task.
They must see and hear in your day-to-day activities, “this is what I
mean to be honest, to be kind, to not complain, to defer to others, to believe
the best, to trust God, to confess your sin, to respect your Mother…” The great double-edged sword of informal
education is that you are always teaching – truths or lies about God and about
covenant loyalty. The number one reason kids leave the church has to be the hypocrisy they saw in
their own home.
“Teach Diligently”
(Deut 6:7) - This verb means to sharpen, and has the idea of constant, over and
over again sharpening, as of a weapon being prepared for battle. Yes, Psalm 127 should come to mind.
Incarnational
Loyalty – When Jesus quotes this greatest commandment,
He is quick to add the second greatest.
Godly loyalty wears a particular garb and speaks in a particular
way. It is not simply down ‘in our
heart.’ How you speak to your wife and
how your children speak to their mother measures their loyalty. Their ‘need’ or lack thereof to individually
express themselves with rebellious clothing,
hairstyles, or piercings, is nothing more than
additional measurements.
Loyalty That
Produces Humility – Diligent parents
often attempt to do their childrearing by the book, but not by grace through
faith. Faithful parents confess their
shortcomings, and give the glory to God alone for every fruit that is
given. There is no
back-slapping and no sidelong glances.
Faithful parents begin and end their work by faith – faith in the
promises of God.
The Shaping of Loyalty – Most of what your children will become
will not be due to those super-memorable moments, special events, and carefully
thought out teaching times. Most of what
your children will become will be due to the atmosphere, the aroma, of your
home. Does it smell of fear and love for
the Lord? Does it explode in joy,
forgiveness, grace, and love because of all that Christ has done for you? Is the standard of God’s law central in
discipline and discipling because the love from and for God is central and
objectively noticeable in all that you say and do? This is how you live in the promises of
God. This is how you train and admonish
your children in the Lord.