Cultured Olive Branches - Godly Discipline in the Promises (Eph 6:1-4) –

 - A Redeemed Culture #14

 

Introduction - The promises to our children are that ‘it would go well with you upon the earth’ – do we believe that and all that it entails?  In light of those beliefs we want to instruct our children to obey their parents – in the Lord – and we want to use God’s instructions to us as to how.

 

Children and Parents (Eph 6:1-4) – Children are commanded to obey their parents in the Lord, and fathers (particularly, but mothers as well) are commanded not to provoke their children.  The fathers are, of course, responsible for both commands, and this means again that fathers must be students of the Word, of wisdom, and of their children.  And for children, the standard should be simple:  prompt, cheerful obedience.

“Bring them up” – Translated ‘nourish’ in 5:29, this command means that our admonition, our discipline, our instruction, and our affection towards our children are, by faith, to ‘feed’ them.

Training and Admonition – “Paideia” is a very broad word meaning the cultivation of the soul, the disciplined education and training in all areas of life.  “Nouthesia” means to impart understanding, to warn, to set right, and to lay on the heart – it is what we are called to do to one another in our singing (Col 3:16) and what we are to do by the Word with our children.  Fathers again should be thinking in terms of ‘teaching them diligently’ (Deut 6:7) and this should bring to mind the sharpening of arrows, a la Psalm 127.

 

 

Atmosphere Matters – Godly discipline requires, by definition, a godly home.

Home With a Pleasant Culture (1 Thess 2:10-12, Rom 2:4) – Fellowship, affection, kindness, and comfort, must so fill a Christian home that when this fellowship is broken through discipline, there is an obvious and stark contrast.  In this kind of a home, repentance and restoration will be sought because the child loves the culture of the home.

Qualified Parents (Gal 6:1-2) – Discipline must occur in a spirit of gentleness and humility.  If you are angry or embarrassed, you are disqualified.  You must confess your own sin first before you attempt to drive sin from your child.  You must discipline as one who desires to “bear one another’s burdens.”  You are not in the process of distancing yourself from that awful little sinner, but rather you are coming alongside and walking with them through this trial. 

In The Name of the Lord – Children are to obey their parents because God has granted authority to the parents.  This means that all discipline must include instruction from the Word, the ultimate authority.  Children must know that they have disobeyed the Lord, not simply their parents.

 

 

Proverbs:  The Book of Wisdom – This book provides us with much insight into the whys and wherefores of discipline, the use of the rod, and God’s promises.

Prov 3:11-12 – Discipline proves they are your children and they are loved.  Why does Dad spank you kids?  (Heb 12:5-11).  God gives little bottoms to us for just this purpose.

Prov 13:1 – Your children must learn to ‘accept’ discipline.  Sweet times of teaching can occur during discipline.  Among other things this affects how they stand when receiving the rod.

Prov 13:24 – Let us be clear.  If you do not spank your little ones, you hate them.

Prov 15:5 – Discipline is not punishment, it is not a time of purgatory.  Its purpose is to teach and change – there is something for them to receive.

Prov 19:18 – There is a particular time to trust the promises of God and His means of discipline.  To be lax during that time period is to seek your child’s destruction.

Prov 20:30 – Again, in Heb 12:5-11 we see that discipline is to be painful, not joyful for the moment.  Upon the bottom, this stinging pain causes no injury, and yet, done in faith, discipline cleanses and produces fruit.  The result is almost always a more cheerful home.

Prov 22:6 – Remember to think of this verse in light of children with souls, created in the image of God, and of God’s promises to parents in the covenant.  And do not forget, training is something you do over and over and over again.

Prov 22:15 – Stop the debate.  Spanking works.  In the context of Promises – spanking is efficacious.

Prov 23:13-14 – Someone once called these verses “Rod Evangelism”.

Prov 29:15 – Education alone does not produce wisdom.

Prov 29:17 – Your children can be very pleasant, godly people, and bring you great joy.

 

 

A Redeemed Culture – Your children are not animals to be trained, but children of God’s promises to be nurtured according to those promises by faith.  And yet, Christians often have more hope in their dog turning out well than their children.  Faith, remember, is confidence in things not yet seen.  Therefore, remember the end when you are in the middle of the middle.

A Liturgy of Spanking – A time of discipline is a time to remember and teach with the end/goal in mind.  Go to a place with discretion so that your child is not shamed.  Name the sin with him or her.  Apply the rod calmly but firmly (learn from those you know have been successful in this).  Assure them of your forgiveness and teach them to seek the Lord’s (1 John 1:9, Col 3:13).  Hug them and invite them back into the fellowship of this culture the Lord is building in your home for the conquest of the nations.

 Dave Hatcher – July 3^rd, 2005